I have a journal that I write in everyday at any moment of the day to express my feelings. It's actually helping me out with the different stages that I'm going through this days: anger, sadness, lonely, and laughter. I think everyone should have a journal not only as time like these but just a daily reminder of how you feel or felt each day. I wish I would have a journal when Jason and I started dating and all the trials and happiness that we had through the years. To be honest I could have wrote a book on us and it would probably be a best seller. Ha! Ha! Some people don't know what we have went through at such young age. We both had to grow real quick to face some of the things we have went through and it made us stronger. Anyways I know I'm just rambling on and on but as I write in personal journal book that nobody knows my feelings but I also like to express it on my blog. My blog is my journal. The certain things that I want my friends and family to know( not everything.) I know when Kathy and I was at the social security office today we both shared some of our feelings about Jason and it felt good. Cause me and her have something in common we are hurting knowing that the day before Jason went into ICU that was the last time that we got to really talk and spend time with him before he died. It hurts us so bad that we didn't get to have the proper goodbye that we wanted like the simply 3 words I LOVE YOU (its take for granted). I don't know about her (shes prob. feels the same way) but it hurts that the Jason we knew and loved wasn't in that ICU and that's our last image of him. I have never been the one to express my feelings y'all can ask anyone but Its helping me cope with the different emotions that I'm going through. Some days I feel like screaming, crying, laughing about him, or completely lonely at times knowing I have a great support system. I'm so Thankful for my family and friends. I have the BEST people around and they just let me "do what I do" as Jason would say. I'm going to have my Good and Bad days so future warning don't be surprise what you see on my Blog (my journal to my friends.) I just want everyone to know that I love each and everyone of y'all and I'm so happy that I'm can confined in y'all through my blog.
Monday, February 1, 2010
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7 comments:
Hey Sister,
I haven't started my "journal" that Leah gave to me yet...not quite sure how I want to use it yet...I can't seem to quit "bottling" my feelings. I know it isn't good, but that is my way of coping right now. I am in denial, I guess. I found a picture of Jason on my cell phone that I took when I went with him to the doctor while he was still at home and I just looked at it and cried. I couldn't help it. I guess right now I don't understand why God chose Jason (I'm not mad, but just don't understand). We will get through this together, though. I love you and PLEASE let me know if there is anything that I can do for you and I will do the same. I am sure that we will get together again soon. Know that I am praying for you and those sweet nephews of mine. Okay...I'm leaving the "longest comment in the world" as Jason would say...
I love you. You have been so strong...and I admire you for it.
Lindsey
I think this is a great idea for you to blog your feelings b/c sometimes you may not feel like talking but you can still get them out and that is a good idea. I am praying for you and I admire you for the strong person you are however i know there are days you don't feel strong but just know that you are such an inspiration to all. I will be thinking of you and praying for you and as always if there is anything you need or I can do let me know.
Thank yall...i know in time God will heal all the wounds..Ashlee trust me start your journal so far its helping me get all my thoughts out I actually feel better when I do it. THe things you are feeling but you dont want no one else to know then just write it down and if you need ANYTHING just let me know...we are all going through the same thing right now and we need each other to get through this...love you
Lindsey, the jornal is a great idea. I enjoyed talking to you this morning. I just hope you know how much i love you and im here for you.
Lindsey,
I am glad you are journaling! In good times & bad it helps to write down what is in your head. It has always helped me work through things.
I am glad you are going to use your blog to put down your thoughts & feelings. That takes a strong person to put it out for us to share.
I love you!
Love you Lindsey!!! Gracie and I are coming to see you someday this week.
I knew you would get use out of that journal! I just knew that no matter what you wrote here on your blog or what you said in conversation, we cannot and never will be able to understand all the pain that you feel. Plus, you are a lot like me. It's hard to wear your emotions on your sleeve. It's much easier to hide what you are feeling and put on a happy face. Those journals will keep coming chica! You let me know when that one is full, and I'll be sure you keep getting them! God hears you Lindsey and he knows you are hurting. We are need here to judge you, because we don't know how you feel and we don't walk in your shoes. However, we're here to help when you are ready. We love you and the boys!
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